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19 February 2012 @ 06:45 pm
Fanfic: Before the Dawn [Doctor Who]  

Title: Before the Dawn
Rating: PG
Category: Genfic, Martha-centric (surprised me, too)
Beta: None
A/N: Uber-short little ficlet set during “Last of the Time Lords”. Quotes in italics come from 3x03 (“Gridlock”), 3x11 (“Utopia”), and 3x06 (“The Lazarus Experiment”)

He’s something other than a Doctor, tonight.

Martha tugs her jacket more tightly around herself, hunkering down behind a conveniently placed boulder and wondering why she’s hiding from her best friend. A year ago (two days ago) she would have stood beside him boldly, as the caretaker she’s trained to be or as the jealous hopeful she fears she’s let herself become.

(She knows she’s brave, but it’s going to be awhile before cowering in the shadows stops feeling so natural.)

(Tomorrow. Tomorrow she stops hiding.)

She understands, now, that this is a part of his life that she has no claim on. All the Master means to her is aching legs and an empty stomach, Tish’s involuntary flinch and Tom’s staring eyes, a year of pain and death and unending terror…

She wonders what he could possibly mean to the Doctor to deserve this grief, these flames, this honor.

And what is he to you? A colleague, or—
A friend, at first.

She wonders who the Doctor’s forgiveness was really supposed to save.

I'm not just a Time Lord. I'm the last of the Time Lords...They're all gone now. My family. My friends. Even that sky.

She wonders what he’s seeing burn, tonight— a man, or a world?

In the end you just get tired. Tired of the struggle. Tired of losing everyone that matters to you. Tired of watching everything turn to dust.

He watches the flames. She watches him.

(Tomorrow. Tomorrow she leaves.)

Current Location: Procrastination-ville
Current Mood: mellowmellow
Current Music: Florence + The Machine - My Boy Builds Coffins
giallarhorn: this is fanficgiallarhorn on February 20th, 2012 12:52 am (UTC)
And you were worried about your writing being stilted :P

I rather liked how you showed her previous roles in relation to the Doctor, to her very much changed one where she's just so much removed, and how the Master isn't a personal enemy on proxy through the Doctor, but on a much more individual and personal level.

P.S. You should write more.
sweet_anise: DW DoctorMaster Drumssweet_anise on February 20th, 2012 03:26 pm (UTC)
Thank you!

I feel like it's easy to forget that Martha lived a whole, linear year between SotD and LotTL. Depending on what you imagine we weren't shown, and how you regard spin-off novels relative to canon, that could easily be longer than she spent with the Doctor. She wasn't the same woman anymore.
giallarhorn: Doomsdaygiallarhorn on February 21st, 2012 01:43 am (UTC)
It's kind of weird to consider how we were really, well, robbed of seeing her develop in that year- not to say that I don't understand why it wouldn't be feasible, but there were enough changes in who she was that it'd have been nice to really see how much she had changed. Which I guess is what her appearance in S4 was for.
WishingStar (a.k.a. magic_7_words)magic_7_words on February 20th, 2012 01:43 am (UTC)
YOU ARE BRILLIANT. Why is there not more of this?

Favorite line: (She knows she’s brave, but it’s going to be awhile before cowering in the shadows stops feeling so natural.)

Or maybe the one about all the Master means to her.
sweet_anise: DW DoctorMaster Drumssweet_anise on February 20th, 2012 03:32 pm (UTC)
Thank you thank you thank you!

"More of this" as in this fic, or fic in general? If it's the former, then I agree it's very short, and part of me thought it should be longer, but I decided that these moment-in-time introspective fics are a lot more powerful when they're short. Anything longer, I felt, and it'd be too rambl-y... unless I introduced a plot or had the Doctor and Martha interact, and I didn't want to go AU.

Thanks for noting your favorite lines! It makes me feel warm and fuzzy.
WishingStar (a.k.a. magic_7_words)magic_7_words on February 20th, 2012 11:50 pm (UTC)
Oh, I meant fic in general. I agree that this type is better short.